First I attack it with mdbtools and find there are 30 tables, which am I to choose? I look through all of them and find Names which seems to have what he wanted. I dumped it in CSV to a file and then did my magic with awk to get names addresses and zip codes. Of course with handy cups-pdf installed I run it through pdfprint. It turns out theres 192 pages. I say fuck that and leave it as is in a pdf and email it to him.
Of course that couldn't be the end. I get a response back from the mailserver tailing me his email account is full. Spectacular, he must have a quota of 5mb for these crap school accounts. So I then upload it to my webserver, send him another email saying its there and thats what happened. All will be found out tomorrow. M$ Access suuuuuuuuucks.